// archives

Girl Who Likes Balls

This tag is associated with 107 posts

Girl Who Likes Balls – Leicester City

Sexpest Goes to Leicester Leicester City 0 Chelsea 0 – Sunday 12th May 2019 15:00 This is a big deal. Regulars will remember that not only is Sexpest really old. (You might recall the virginity story about the woman born in the reign of Queen Victoria, or the accidental Facebook spamming that made him look […]

Girl Who Likes Balls – Eintracht Frankfurt

“Get in Hazard You Little F***ing Sexpuppet!” Chelsea 1 (2) Eintracht Frankfurt 1 (2) (Chelsea win 4-3 on penalties) – Thursday 9th May 2019 20:00 I could not have put it better myself. The credit, however, goes to the mad bloke jumping and down behind me when the last penalty went in. In the News: […]

Girl Who Likes Balls – Watford

He’s Staying! Chelsea 3 Watford 0 – Sunday 5th May 2019 14:00 No, not Eden. But Sarri was tasked with top four. And he’s done it. With a game to spare. Strap yourselves in, because you’ve got to live with his methods, his substitutions, his love affair with poor, maligned Jorginho AND that hideous new […]

Girl Who Likes Balls – Cardiff, Brighton, Everton and West Ham

They Definitely Are Still West Ham Chelsea 2 West Ham 0 – Monday 8th April 2019 20:00 As if readjusting to the temperature at home wasn’t terrifying enough. Chelsea created a neanderthal photo mash in tonight’s programme of Ampadu, Cahill and The Beard. Still looked more intelligent as a life form than anything playing for […]

Girl Who Likes Balls – Dynamo Kiev

One Kiev, Stuffed. Chelsea 3 Dynamo Kiev 0 – Europa League Last 16 – Thursday 7th March 2019 20:00 In the News: The appeal is in against the transfer ban. Don’t know whether yet whether that will enable us to sign people this summer. Sarri’s been having talks about pre-season. Probably along the lines of […]

Girl Who Likes Balls – Fulham

We Don’t Hate You, Cos You’re Sh*t ​Fulham 1 Chelsea 2 – Sunday 3rd March 2019 14:05 This was the 82nd West London derby. Fulham have won precisely nine of them. Hence why this away-day excursion is thoroughly enjoyable, and nobody wants to see them go down, but it doesn’t pack a punch. In the […]

Girl Who Likes Balls – Tottenham Hotspur

It’s Happened Again! Chelsea 2 North London Jellyfish 0 – Wednesday 27th February 2019 20:00 Ahahahaha, another season, no home, no trophies and a deep sense of emptiness for a club that one week ago thought they might just win the league. In the News: The fallout from Kepagate/Sarri’s tantrum continued after Sunday. Apparently Kepa […]

Girl Who Likes Balls – Malmo

Apocalypse Now Malmo 1 Chelsea 2 – Thursday 14th February 2019 20:00 Right now my brain is reeling. I never thought that I would hear myself say “Michael Owen has made me feel better.” If he is the voice of reason, then the rest of the world must really have gone to sh*t. Bertie is […]

Girl Who Likes Balls – Man City

What the F*cking Hell Was That Manchester City: I stopped counting Chelsea: 0 – Sunday 10th February 2019 16:00 Mother of god. This time last week I was watching a lioness chew the middle out of a still bleeding zebra and it was less gruesome than this. Someone’s just lobbed their membership card at Rudiger […]

Girl Who Likes Balls – Newcastle – Arsenal – Tottenham

Revenge is a Dish Best Served Cold Chelsea 2 (2) Sp*rs 1 (2) Chelsea win 5-3 on penalties Carabao Cup Semi-Final Second Leg – Thursday 22nd January 19:45 I left you guys for eight days and I come back to a scene from the end of a f*cking Tarantino film. 6000 rounds of spent ammunition […]

Article Categories

CSG Merchandise

Buy your CSG merchandise or overseas membership on Paypal now!
Please state clothing size and which item you are purchasing: